This blog is the sixth (and perhaps last) installment of the ongoing story that deals with my past-life experiences. You may want to read my previous blogs for the essential back story, but I can give you a brief summary right here. Basically, in the later part of 2010, I learned that I had a recent past-life as a man in Poland and also a recent past-life as a woman in Hollywood (actress Carole Lombard). The two lives coexisted with each other, which is a phenomenon called a "parallel existence". Needless to say, it was a little weird discovering that my soul was in two bodies at the same time, not to mention the fact that one of these incarnations was as a woman. But the parallel existence and female incarnation were only the tip of the iceberg (so to speak). Recently, I discovered that the life in Poland and Hollywood were only two past lives...out of a whopping thirty-two. Yes, you heard me correctly: I have had 32 past lives!!!
Now, you may be wondering how I arrived at such a discovery. Well, last month I visited a palm reader named Jesse who suggested that I needed a "spiritual cleansing" (read about the palm reading HERE). Jesse insisted that I had a "darkness in my aura" that resulted from past-life traumas. I consequently went home and tried to conduct the cleansing myself (read how in the blog), but I wasn't sure it had been completely effective. There was a feeling in my gut that I hadn't gotten all the "darkness" out of my system.
At first, I considered going back to Jesse, because she had said she could cleanse me if I wanted her to. But she charged a good amount of money for it ($150). Plus, the cleansing methods she described to me seemed a little strange (it involved carrying candles around with me or something along those lines). I'm sure whatever she did would have probably worked, but I didn't feel very comfortable with her. I didn't really want a stranger messing with my aura and energy field. What if she ended up opening up another hole and allowed more negative energy to get in? What if an entity or demon attached itself to me? Surely I didn't want that to happen. But if I didn't trust Jesse with the cleansing of my aura, who WAS I going to trust??? Well, it actually didn't take very long for me to come up with another person.
See, for more than ten years now, I have been a client of a woman named Samantha (name changed) who is essentially everything from a healer to a dietitian to an allergist to a homeopathic therapist to a Reiki master to a medium and a psychic. Over the years, Samantha has helped "clear" unwanted energies out of my system, including Lyme disease, drugs (mild ones like marijuana) and even allergies. I mean, before I knew Samantha I was extremely allergic to dairy products; whenever I ate a yogurt or drank milk I would get a mean strep throat that was always difficult to get rid of. But after Samantha cleared me of the allergy I could eat dairy without any problem at all. I never got any more strep throats. It was almost miraculous what she did for me.
Samantha has also been very successful in clearing more intangible negative energies from my system, such as feelings, fears, thought-patterns and even depressing worldviews. She once cleared feelings of rejection, for example. And also feelings of failure. One time Samantha even helped clear a feeling of hopelessness, that the world was doomed.
Anyway, I figured if Samantha could clear negative energies from my current life as Matt Burns then she was probably the woman to see if I wanted to clear energies from my past lives. So I gave Samantha a call, made an appointment with her, and found myself in her Boston office only a week later.
To my surprise, I found that it was easier to explain my situation to Samantha than I had initially thought. Basically, I just told her that I recently uncovered some past-life traumas and I thought it would be a good idea to cleanse myself of any negative energy I've carried over from previous lives.
"Are you able to do this kind of a thing?" I asked her.
"And do you think it's something I need to do?"
Samantha asked my (spirit) guides whether this was a good idea and they gave her a definite...
But they said they couldn't do it all in one cleansing. All my body could clear at one time was energy from 13 lives...out of a whopping 32! Yikes.
"I see you soldiering in some of them," Samantha added. "And in others there's a lot of residual anger...at people who killed you in the past."
Yes, apparently deep in my soul I was essentially still pissed off at the people who had wronged me in previous lives. And the more I thought about it, the more this all started to make sense...because throughout my entire life, I've always had rage inside of me. Honestly, I never knew why I had the rage. I didn't have a rotten childhood. I wasn't abused in any way. I wasn't bullied in school. I got everything I wanted for Christmas. But, still, there was always rage inside of me, from almost as early on as I can remember. And don't get me wrong: I rarely showed my rage to others. In fact, I think a lot of people would be surprised to learn I had a problem with anger. I've actually always been a very peaceful person when it came to associating with people and I've hardly ever gotten into a fight. But the rage has always been present, lingering in my chest like a snake in the grass.
So maybe the source of my rage - this whole entire time - has been from past lives. Honestly, it seems to be the most probable explanation. I mean, think about it: thirty-two-lives-worth of negative trauma is bound to leave some kind of a mark. According to Samantha, I was murdered in some of these lives. Killed in battles and burned in fires. Raped in Hollywood. Manipulated by the Nazis in Poland. Fucked over in various ways. Screwed. Victimized. Et cetera. Et cetera.
So, yes, with so much trauma under my belt, perhaps it's easy to understand why I've always had repressed rage, but I think the fact that I've even held onto so much anger is a sign that I've been a rather immature soul this whole time. I mean, who am I even angry at? The schmuck who killed me in life-number-three? Or the rapist in the Hollywood life? The Nazis in the Poland life? Honestly, if there's anybody to blame for my rage it's myself. As Samantha pointed out to me, we CHOOSE our various lives and we CHOOSE to be put into "traumatic" situations. Yes, talk to any meta-physicist anywhere (see list of books below) and they all seem to agree that we "chart" our lives before human incarnation. Every single minute detail of our lives is painstakingly planned, like who we are going to meet, what experiences we will go through...who we will work with...marry...divorce etc.
So if we actually choose our entire life, how can we ever consider ourselves a "victim" of anything? And if we are never a victim of anything, how can we ever be angry at anybody? The answer is we can't. Or we shouldn't. Anger is a complete waste of time and harboring such negative feelings for prolonged periods of time is a sign of immaturity. If only people started realizing this, the world would probably be a much more peaceful place. Maybe there would be less wars. Less murders. Corruption. Retribution. Revenge. Who knows?
Anyway, Samantha eventually had me lie on a table and she "cleared" me of all the negative energy I had accumulated during 13 of the 32 past lives. The way in which Samantha conducts the clearing is a little difficult to explain and would likely raise a lot of eyebrows, especially for the average layman. It's very Shaman-like, actually. She essentially sucks the bad energy out of your aura with her hands and then discards it back into the bowels of the earth. Yes, this sounds strange as anything, but you definitely feel a noticeable difference while she does it. The place where she touches you usually gets very warm - sometimes very hot. This heat is actually the energy being released from the body. And afterward, you feel much lighter. A lot more relaxed.
During my clearing, Samantha informed me that the negative energy from the past lives had been affecting me on a physical level, as well as on an emotional one. The energy was supposedly having an adverse effect on my muscles, intestines, pituitary gland, pancreas, liver, brain and other physical components of my physiology. Who would ever think that the cause of a physical ailment could have roots in a past-life trauma? Think about how many people out there have chronic physical problems that baffle doctors? It's kind of a shame that the medical world never thinks to look in the past for answers. Maybe they will as the human race becomes more spiritually evolved.
Anyway, I feel like the "cleansing" was what I needed all along. I think this was the main reason why I was so drawn to my past lives in the first place. What started out as sheer curiosity about reincarnation ended up leading me to uncover the cause of my repressed rage and mysterious physical issues. Hopefully the cleansing gradually makes me feel better as time goes forward. Of course, I still have to go back to see Samantha so I can have the other 19 lives cleared. But in the meantime I think I'm going to notice a big change in my overall temperament, not to mention my physical well-being.
Now, one thing you may be wondering about is why I didn't just clear the traumas while I was on the "other side", before I decided to become reincarnated in another body on earth. Why couldn't I have just gotten God or whoever to help me deal with the negativity while I was in spirit form and consciously aware of all that happened in the past? Well, the problem is that when we're on the "other side", the negativity doesn't affect us at all...mainly because negativity doesn't exist. According to renowned psychic Sylvia Browne in her book The Other Side and Back, it's not until we go back into another body that the fears, anger, victimization etc. terrorizes us again. We don't realize it on a conscious level, but our subconscious mind fears that as long as we're in a body again, there is the potential for more terrible things to happen to us. So the cleansing is something that needs to be done while we're in a body. In spirit form - where there is no fear and all energy is positive - a cleansing would be absolutely pointless.
So, anyway, hopefully the cleansing works for me. To be honest, I already feel a hell of a lot better. It's like I've been wallowing in tar my whole life and now I've finally been freed from its grips. We'll have to see if the feeling lasts....
For further reading about reincarnation and how we "chart" each of our lives:
Ghosts Among Us by James Van Praagh.
Life on the Other Side: A Psychic's Tour of the Afterlife by Sylvia Browne.
The Other Side and Back by Sylvia Browne.
Many Lives, Many Masters by Brian L. Weiss.
Your Soul's Plan by Robert Schwartz